Saturday, December 22, 2018

Sporadic and luminous mutations

I'd like to thank The Chancellor of the Holy Order of the Sasquatch Office of Wild Hypothesis with presenting me with the opportunity to award myself the Certificate of Meta-Authenticity. I hope that my influence will continue to be felt by both figments and non-figments alike in 2019 and for many more years to come. 

The winter solstice this year was a rainy and warm one. I don't know if I dislike that fact, but it just is. I enjoyed walking outside in just a hoodie, but I didn't like having to wear my waterproof boots. I prefer my Crocs, thank you. I don't want to walk anywhere unless I feel like I'm walking in bedroom slippers. 

The semester is finally over, and the ending was so intense it felt like the end of a chapter of my life. I feel like the intensity of the semester was so powerful that it forced me to mutate into some sort of new creature. I had to actually. I had to change to deal with the high impact of change that occurred to my mind and super-consciousness. I'm exhausted. Like, really tired. Tired to the point where I hardly care about anything. I mean, even more so than usual.

The world could end tomorrow, and I may die, but I don't care. I no longer fear tomorrow. I really can't tell if that's a positive new way to think, or a negative one, but it'll keep me going and surviving for a bit more time. 

I won't be returning to college for the Spring semester. I don't know if I'll ever return. That's how I feel right now. I've been in and out of college my whole life, and it was never really a fit for me. Call it ego, call it laziness, call it whatever, but I feel like I have better things to do with my time, but I kept sidelining those things to do this bullshit. It hardly matters to me, but, it does matter to those around me so I kept going along with it. Well, at least for the first half of next year I won't have to think about it. Maybe if my nihilism clears up I'll go back in the Fall, but we'll see. 

The way I figure it is, 2019 must be some sort of mystical breaking point for me and my trajectory in life. I have to be able to do what I want to do so I can finally feel some sort of self worth. I live a relatively happy life. I have my hobbies and interests, but I'd like to return to who I was in the past and maybe do a bit more creating. Drawing, painting, editing, etc. Something that is a bit more fulfilling, you know?

So anyway...

Somewhere on Facebook I stumbled across someone's post about Luigi Cozzi's "Cozilla" film. It's just a strangely colorized and psychedelic version of the original "Godzilla". Cozzi apparently originally wanted to do this with the original "Gojira" but couldn't obtain the rights. I feel like I've heard of this version before but I never bothered to search for it. It might be interesting I guess; I look forward to watching it while """medicated"""".

My turtles, Junior and Mary, are still doing pretty well. I'm finally putting together some money to buy a second tank so I can separate them. They're usually very peaceful but every once in a while Junior gets aggressive and it makes me feel anxious. For Xmas I plan on getting them some nice fresh shrimp to munch on. 

This little guy I got in Nevada two years ago. He's from an old line of dolls called Ghost Alley Attic Hangers, by Applause. It was love at first sight, and I bought him immediately and named him Lester. I recently dug him out of a box he was in and decided he'd would look best on my desk next to my computer; and you know what? I was right. I especially love how his eyes glow in the dark. Truly beautiful.

The universe really is a playful place when you get down to it. Through the lens of Slack, we can experience real and true culture. All questions can be answered, all mysteries solved, and joy and wonderment can flourish for infinitum if we were only able to attune ourselves to the significant densities and signals that the omniverse tries to send our way. Instead we mutate in a direction that leaves us pink and greyfaced, when we could be living an existence where we can control time and space. We have to live and breathe the chaos, riding the universe until it kicks us off. We don't have to live each day like it's our last, but like each day will last forever. Doing what we love, doing who we love, exploring, mutating, and savoring our existence. We live surrounded by treasure and yet we treat it all like trash. I suppose the best course of action we can have is to find some balance, some solace in it all, and try to live the best possible lives we can, free from as much unwanted and unneeded influence as possible. In the end, existence is a painful experience, but, any existence you can walk away from is a good one.

I'm not sure what the fandom is called, or how it came to be, but there's a bunch of folks on Twitter who're into it. They dress like cyclops and other monsters, put on cute outfits, and model for pictures or video themselves. I don't know what it is, but I love it. 

Arachna of the Spider People hosts Beware Theater with her skeleton sidekick, Deadly. I've been watching her videos lately in the evening and I really enjoy her selection of movies. A good mixture of obscure, B, and cult films. This was my first time viewing "The Manster" and I had no idea it was a Japanese-American production. What a surprise. 

I've also been watching Dr. Gangrene's Creature Feature. He's a lot more cartoony than Arachna and Mister Lobo, with his bright colorful sets and strange almost Acme funded technology. A Nashville based horror host, I'm happy he's uploaded so much onto to YouTube for me to enjoy.

Since I'm a proud supporter of OSI74, I've been watching more and more of their programming. Normally, since I'm a card carrying member of The Sleepless Knights of Insomnia, I just watch Cinema Insomnia, but recently I've also been watching Preacher Features, and now Monster Madhouse. If you've never seen "Pulgasari" before, this might be the best introduction to that movie and also Monster Madhouse. You're welcome.

Monster Madhouse PULGASARI

Although I am quite poor, I had the sudden urge to rededicate my allegiance to THE DAVE LIEBE HART INTERPLANETARY FRIENDSHIP & FUN TIMES LEAGUE. The minimum is only $5, and you get all of David's amazing music via Bandcamp. Recently, I've been rocking out to the album "Space Ranger" nearly everyday. 

I suppose that's all for now. I hope everyone has a beautiful holiday season no matter what holiday you celebrate, if any at all. I have a lot of thinking and planning on doing for the upcoming year. 

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